I turned something really good down earlier this year on a hunch - and a perfect (and very profitable) project fell in my lap a few weeks later which I wouldn’t have been able to take on. I’d never done that before but knew straight away it was right - I could feel my whole body take a breath as I was saying no. ‘No’ is a muscle I think, it does get easier!
Such a great post to read today. I just made a big decision and not only feel lighter but also WAY more aligned to the life I truly desire to create. So good. Thanks for sharing. 💗
I loved this one! This is me with full-time jobs and the temptation of falling back into what's safe and secure. Bookmarking this for future reference (probably tomorrow).
Anna, this hits at the heart of something so many creators struggle with - the tyranny of "good" opportunities. Your framework for evaluating trade-offs is brilliant because it forces us to confront the hidden costs that are often invisible until we're already drowning in them.
What strikes me most is your insight about "yes-regret" - that feeling of being trapped in a "self-constructed cage of amazing opportunities." This is such a modern problem where our fear of missing out can actually prevent us from building the thing we really want. Your decision to preserve your "unbridled joy of not being accountable to other people's deadlines" shows a deep understanding of what actually drives creative fulfillment.
The questions you've outlined create a decision-making framework that goes beyond simple cost-benefit analysis - they force us to examine alignment with our deeper values and long-term vision. "Do I care about these losses?" is particularly powerful because it acknowledges that not all costs are equal, and that what matters is subjective fit with our unique circumstances and goals.
Your story is a perfect example of systems thinking applied to career decisions - recognizing that saying yes to one thing necessarily means saying no to everything else. The immediate relief you felt after declining confirms you made the right choice for your particular optimization function.
Thanks for modeling what it looks like to choose strategic focus over impressive opportunities. This kind of decision-making discipline is exactly what separates successful portfolio careers from scattered hustle.
Love this! Congrats on being approached for it and even more congrats for trusting your gut! I’m also halfway through your launching a mini offer and loving it! 💛
There’s opportunity cost with every decision. I come from the film world and the common ethos is that you should always be working toward bigger opportunities. The trade-off is, everything else in LIFE gets put on hold while trying to get those chances that so many covet and so few get.
I’m intimately familiar with breathing that sigh of relief.
We hear the "it's a hell-ya or it's a no" advice and - if you are generally a "hell-ya" person - you just overload yourself.
For big decisions, writing it down helps think it through. Even if it feels like "hell-ya". And then, you can look at the decision log 6 months later and say "yep, these assumptions were right and I made the right decision" or " I had a flawed assumption, I need to do this better next time".
It is a worthwhile experiment, even for a short period of time. Surfaces unexpected things, like "I was super excited about this and hence..." Sometimes decisions flip from good to bad and back over time, depending how things unfold ("I bought a house, then market crashed, so... But then...").
Feel this. When we get access to a big logo or status symbol, it's so hard to reject it when from the outside, it seems like the highest attainment within our industry or culture. I'm working on a post right now about self-sabotaging a gig that was offered to me at the biggest AI company in the world, and how I struggled with taking it just for the clout/logo/exposure. Finally I listened to my gut and asked myself "do I want this prize?" and realized I totally did not :)
Well... even as I outwardly went through the motions of getting excited about this gig, my lizard brain was self sabotaging. I gave them a fairly high rate (R rated version: “F you pay me rate” or PG version: my “no” rate) without worrying if they’d balked.
They did balk as we negotiated on rates — and their reaction was very much “we are already giving you a foot in the door and money shouldn’t even matter here.” (because clout can pay my rent, right?!)
When I asked for more time to think about it, they started interviewing other candidates and I knew I’d lost the gig. And all I felt was relief! Not disappointment, not FOMO—pure relief.
Loved this, Anna! I’ve been having a lot of conversations this week about the idea of portfolio careers being like a stovetop (bear with me 😅) — many of us have a pot cooking on all 5 burners, but only we get to decide which to turn up to level 10 and which to let simmer.
And sometimes…there is the pot we have to fully remove for the time being. It’s a hard decision but often needed!
I turned something really good down earlier this year on a hunch - and a perfect (and very profitable) project fell in my lap a few weeks later which I wouldn’t have been able to take on. I’d never done that before but knew straight away it was right - I could feel my whole body take a breath as I was saying no. ‘No’ is a muscle I think, it does get easier!
This inevitably happens! It’s the universe rewarding our good decision making 🥰
Such a great post to read today. I just made a big decision and not only feel lighter but also WAY more aligned to the life I truly desire to create. So good. Thanks for sharing. 💗
Congratulations for going with your gut ❤️
🥳
I loved this one! This is me with full-time jobs and the temptation of falling back into what's safe and secure. Bookmarking this for future reference (probably tomorrow).
🫶🏼
Anna, this hits at the heart of something so many creators struggle with - the tyranny of "good" opportunities. Your framework for evaluating trade-offs is brilliant because it forces us to confront the hidden costs that are often invisible until we're already drowning in them.
What strikes me most is your insight about "yes-regret" - that feeling of being trapped in a "self-constructed cage of amazing opportunities." This is such a modern problem where our fear of missing out can actually prevent us from building the thing we really want. Your decision to preserve your "unbridled joy of not being accountable to other people's deadlines" shows a deep understanding of what actually drives creative fulfillment.
The questions you've outlined create a decision-making framework that goes beyond simple cost-benefit analysis - they force us to examine alignment with our deeper values and long-term vision. "Do I care about these losses?" is particularly powerful because it acknowledges that not all costs are equal, and that what matters is subjective fit with our unique circumstances and goals.
Your story is a perfect example of systems thinking applied to career decisions - recognizing that saying yes to one thing necessarily means saying no to everything else. The immediate relief you felt after declining confirms you made the right choice for your particular optimization function.
Thanks for modeling what it looks like to choose strategic focus over impressive opportunities. This kind of decision-making discipline is exactly what separates successful portfolio careers from scattered hustle.
A great post Anna - thank you for sharing and for the thoughtful questions to contemplate when at a crossroads with a decision.
Thank you for reading!
Love this! Congrats on being approached for it and even more congrats for trusting your gut! I’m also halfway through your launching a mini offer and loving it! 💛
Oo you’ll have to let me know how you go! I’d love to hear any and all feedback ❤️
There’s opportunity cost with every decision. I come from the film world and the common ethos is that you should always be working toward bigger opportunities. The trade-off is, everything else in LIFE gets put on hold while trying to get those chances that so many covet and so few get.
I’m intimately familiar with breathing that sigh of relief.
There's nothing quite like it!
Agreed!!
🤜🏼💜🤛🏼 "No" well done, Anna!
💪🏼
Congrats on this decisions! So cool to see women bet on themselves ❤️🔥
🫶🏼
This is really good advice!
We hear the "it's a hell-ya or it's a no" advice and - if you are generally a "hell-ya" person - you just overload yourself.
For big decisions, writing it down helps think it through. Even if it feels like "hell-ya". And then, you can look at the decision log 6 months later and say "yep, these assumptions were right and I made the right decision" or " I had a flawed assumption, I need to do this better next time".
Love the idea of doing a decision log and then looking back 6 months later to see whether you made the right call (or not)
It is a worthwhile experiment, even for a short period of time. Surfaces unexpected things, like "I was super excited about this and hence..." Sometimes decisions flip from good to bad and back over time, depending how things unfold ("I bought a house, then market crashed, so... But then...").
Wow, good for you, Anna! Those kinds of opportunities can be so seductive, but well done for sticking to your guns and following the North Star
Thanks lovely
This story makes for great content! Another great insight from you Anna. :)
🫶🏼
Feel this. When we get access to a big logo or status symbol, it's so hard to reject it when from the outside, it seems like the highest attainment within our industry or culture. I'm working on a post right now about self-sabotaging a gig that was offered to me at the biggest AI company in the world, and how I struggled with taking it just for the clout/logo/exposure. Finally I listened to my gut and asked myself "do I want this prize?" and realized I totally did not :)
Did you turn it down??
Well... even as I outwardly went through the motions of getting excited about this gig, my lizard brain was self sabotaging. I gave them a fairly high rate (R rated version: “F you pay me rate” or PG version: my “no” rate) without worrying if they’d balked.
They did balk as we negotiated on rates — and their reaction was very much “we are already giving you a foot in the door and money shouldn’t even matter here.” (because clout can pay my rent, right?!)
When I asked for more time to think about it, they started interviewing other candidates and I knew I’d lost the gig. And all I felt was relief! Not disappointment, not FOMO—pure relief.
Loved this, Anna! I’ve been having a lot of conversations this week about the idea of portfolio careers being like a stovetop (bear with me 😅) — many of us have a pot cooking on all 5 burners, but only we get to decide which to turn up to level 10 and which to let simmer.
And sometimes…there is the pot we have to fully remove for the time being. It’s a hard decision but often needed!
Stovetop is a GREAT analogy!
Love this A x
Thanks beautiful Lucce ❤️
This resonates. Thanks for clarifying, unpacking and articulating what can sometimes be a jumbled mess of thoughts, ambitions and emotions.
I do my best 😊